glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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