Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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