I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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