i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
