I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
