ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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