I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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