How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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