my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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