we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
