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you suck at this game today
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
either way he was missing a nipple.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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