was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
