He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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