Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
MIDGETS
????
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
