Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Bring me that man meat
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
