I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
