I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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