Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
