We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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