Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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