piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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