So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize