how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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