Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Randomize
