Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
