Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
