the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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