he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
