I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
