I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
