I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize