The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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