And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
handjob tips. give me some.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
