your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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