taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
