i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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