He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
