Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I cut my penus on the lid.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Randomize
