it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
