so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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