Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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