been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize