Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I need a burrito and a hug.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
