she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
