Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
