I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
