i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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