he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
