I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
you never un-have a 4some
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
