JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize
